Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Submitted - The Double Loves Series: Eddie and Jocelyn

Here's something different for this blog. Someone has submitted a short story. Yes, we do take submissions, including fiction, whether text or cartoons or illustrations. Nonfiction such as "confessions," commentaries, reports, and case study updates are also welcome, as long as they deal with the topics of this blog, support equality, and are SAFE FOR WORK. If you want to submit anything, you can email to the address fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com. Once you send us something, whether it is used on the blog is entirely up to us and there will be no material compensation. We are willing to give you credit and link to anywhere you want us to link.


*****


The Double Loves Series:  Eddie and Jocelyn
By Martin Witt


18 year old Edward Paul Shepherd left his small hometown of Corinth and was on his way to his freshmen year of college.  His heart was racing with excitement as he flipped on the turn signals to take the exit off the interstate.  Eddie, as friends and family called him, pulled up to the intersection and looked both ways.  In his eagerness to get this new phase of his life going he miscalculated the speed and distance of the traffic coming towards him.  He pulled out and tried to accelerate ahead of the cars closing in on him.  Unfortunately he couldn’t.  There was a crash.   Eddie was critically injured and the other driver died at the scene.


Eddie’s new phase of life was not what he expected.  He was in the hospital for several weeks, with doctors not sure if he’d survive.  The young man was strong however, and he did survive.  Several months in a rehabilitation center gave him the ability to have a reasonable quality of life.  Eddie’s college career finally got started, but he didn’t find it as exciting as he once did. 


While Eddie was physically healed, the guilt he felt for causing the death of another person stayed with him for a long time.  Eddie saw a therapist in hopes of dealing with his emotional trauma.  He didn’t find it beneficial.  Finally, however, Eddie’s therapist suggested he make apologies to the widow of the man who died in the accident. Eddie wasn’t sure he could, but it felt like something he had to do. 


More than a year and a half after the accident Eddie found himself at a modest homelocated on Thebes Street.  It belonged to the late Mr. Laurence King whose death Eddiefelt responsible.  The door opened and there stood the widow, Mrs. Jocelyn King.  Eddie introduced himself and explained why he’d come.  He fully expected Mrs. King to slam the door in his face.   Instead, however, she was kind and welcomed Eddie inside.


Jocelyn heard what Eddie had to say.  She felt his sincerity and accepted his apology.  Eddie felt an immense load taken off his shoulders.  Jocelyn told Eddie that she appreciated his visit, but he was young and still had his entire life ahead.  She told him to let go of the guilt he and move on with his life.  Eddie promised he would.


As Eddie prepared to leave Jocelyn welcomed him to visit her anytime he wanted.  When Eddie left the yard Jocelyn was certain she’d never see him again.  She was wrong.  Eddie did visit, and he visited often.  At first Eddie’s visits were merely to help with simple chores and tasks since Jocelyn had no children of her own.  Jocelyn assumed the young man was working off his guilt.  Before long, however, Eddie’s visits grew beyond chores and conscience clearing.


Though Jocelyn was his senior by at least 20 years, Eddie found her attractive.  Their difference in age began to matter less and less.  Jocelyn realized that the boy was becoming attracted to her.  She feared it was going to lead nowhere good, but Jocelyn felt unable to send her young suitor away.  What woman would not enjoy the attentions of a good looking young man? 


Time passed.  Eddie and Jocelyn grew closer.  Their love became undeniable, though both tried to resist what was happening.  One night when all the stars were in perfect alignment Eddie and Jocelyn found themselves in bed.  Though it was Eddie’s first time Jocelyn found his lovemaking skills more than adequate.


As Jocelyn enjoyed every bit of pleasure that Eddie’s body, youth and stamina offered her, she floated back to the day he showed up at her doorstep.  She thought of every time he visited after that.  Jocelyn remembered watching the young man mow her lawn shirtless and the reactions it caused in her body.  She remembered every compliment he gave her regarding her appearance.  Those compliments inspired Jocelyn to fix herself up a bit so to net more of the boy’s attentions.  Looking back, Jocelyn should have seen all this coming.  She was in love.  It was unexpected, but an amazing love to be sure.


Eddie’s mind was racing to process everything that was happening.  Making love to Jocelyn snapped the last chain of guilt that bound him.  He had let go and was moving into a new phase of his life.  It was unexpected, but an amazing phase to be sure.  He was in love with the most beautiful and kind woman he’d ever known.  His life was perfect. 


The weekend that followed Eddie’s college graduation saw him and Jocelyn married.   No two people ever appeared more perfectly matched than Eddie and Jocelyn.  Their marriage was mythological to all who knew them.  Their love expanded exponentiallyover the years and their family grew.  Jocelyn gave Eddie four beautiful daughters.  The young father was very proud of his family.


One day Eddie received some tragic news.  While on their way to visit him, Eddie’sparents, Mr. and Mrs. Paul Shepherd, were murdered during a carjacking.  By coincidence it was at the same intersection where Eddie’s miscalculation killed Mr. King years prior.  Once the funerals and estate issues were settled, Eddie set out to find the persons who killed his parents.  He patiently worked with the police and investigators to leave no stone unturned.  It took a long time, but eventually the bandits were brought to justice.


Several items that belonged to his parents were recovered along with their car.  One of those items was a jewelry box.  It was precious to his mom and Eddie was glad to get it back.  While everything of any value was long gone, there was a secret compartment that contained a document.  It was a certificate of adoption.  Eddie had no idea.  He was filled with mixed emotions by the revelation.  He surmised that the purpose of his parents’ visit was the share that bit of information with him. 


Eddie tried to learn to live with the reality that the people he thought were his parents were not.  He found, however, that he could not live without knowing who his biological parents were and why they gave him up.  So Eddie set out to find them.  While Jocelyn urged him to move on, she supported his efforts.  The search led nowhere for Eddie until his eldest daughter, Antonia, suggested a DNA survey.  With no other avenues to pursue, Eddie and his family all submitted samples to a company called Delphi, a DNA history firm.  The results come back to reveal that Eddie and Jocelyn are more than husband and wife, but mother and son also.


The information was devastating to the entire family.  Eddie more than anything wanted to know how this happened at all since Jocelyn had no children prior to their marriage.  Jocelyn explained that before she and her first husband, Laurence, were married, he was a seminary student.  Laurence had hopes of becoming a minister.  While he and Jocelyn were still engaged, however, Jocelyn got pregnant.   The seminary’s Dean of Students, as if some all knowing oracle, advised Laurence to “get rid of 'it' or that ends your plans for a life as a minister.”  The impressionable young Laurence did as the Dean advised   When their son was born, they gave him up for adoption and never spoke of him again.


However, Laurence was never “right” after that.  It wasn’t long before the mental and emotional problems began to haunt him.  Surely guilt and some warped religious advice were responsible.  Laurence was convinced that his son was out to kill him.  A psychiatrist prescribed medication to keep Laurence functional, but he’d stopped taking it and was in a delirium on the day he crossed paths with Eddie at that intersection.


Eddie was angry beyond belief.  Killing his father and marrying his mother sounded like something from a Greek tragedy, yet it was his and his family’s reality.  There was no way to process this alone, but even more tragic was the fact that there was nowhere to turn for support.  This situation was no one’s fault, yet everyone involved would be held responsible in the eyes of a judgmental world.


Jocelyn considered killing herself.   Eddie wanted to gouge out his eyes as he could not bare to look at his family. However, inside them both rested a spark that could not be extinguished by any sort of peer, cultural or religious pressure.  Eddie and Jocelyn were in love.  It was not just as husband and wife, but as mother and son also.  It was a double love they shared.  Whether brought together by fate, the Divine or some strange mysterious workings of genetics, they were in love.  That double love was what countedand through whatever came that same double love would be their anchor and elixir.


It took a long time to resolve all the cognitive and social dissonances surrounding their consanguinamoreous relationship, but through the mysterious and nondiscriminatory powers of human love, Eddie P. King and his family did find a way to live happily ever after.



The End


*****
It's an interesting update to classic mythology, no?

Please note, as this is a submission, I'm assuming it doesn't violate any copyrights.

Read More »

NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #11


“It will be a legal/paperwork nightmare as our system is set up for couples.” That’s what the bigots said about same-gender marriage and the Americans With Disabilities Act and just about any civil rights laws. Of course it is easier for those who already have what they want to keep things as they are. But what about all of the people who are denied their rights?

Adopting the polygamous freedom to marry under full marriage equality will take much less adjustment than adopting the Americans With Disabilities Act, the Violence Against Women Act and many other laws necessary to for equal protection and civil rights. Contract and business law already provides adaptable examples of how law can accommodate configurations involving three or more people, including when someone joins an existing relationship or leaves a relationship.


There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (and any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://ift.tt/1K0B6Zj

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #10 

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #12

Read More »

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

SPOILERS - Star Wars Can Still Advance Marriage Equality

You know the drill. If you haven't seen "Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi" yet and don't want any of it spoiled, just skip over this entry.


.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Really. Don't read the rest of this entry if you don't want spoilers.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
After Episode VII, there was much speculation about the identity of Rey's parents. Fans posited various theories. This is what was posted previously on this blog.

Then, as it turns out, the "The Last Jedi" either didn't answer the question or supplied "false" information that Rey's parents aren't part of the established Jedi dynasties.

It is possible that what Rey was told/learned about her parents isn't the truth, or the whole truth.

So, we're holding out hope that she is the result of consanguinamory, which helps explain why she is so powerful even with minimal training. It would also help explain her apparent attraction to Kylo, particularly when he's half-nude.

Make it so! (I know, wrong series.) DO OR DO NOT! THERE IS NO TRY!

Read More »

Sunday, December 17, 2017

How Marriage Equality Supports Family Values and Morality

There are people who constantly make a point of telling us their beliefs that marriage is important for our countries, that being married is good for adults and for children, that commitment is good, that unmarried sex is bad, unmarried cohabitation is bad, that being a single mother is bad, and that marriage is needed to “channel male sexuality.” They cite with worry the fact that there are fewer married households now and more children being raised outside of a home headed by married parents. These are what they say “family values” and “morality” are about. Everyone should get married and only have sex and raise children in marriage and should go to church every week and enjoy “freedom of religion.”


Let’s consider some facts, at least how the stand in the US (your country may vary.)…


  • Some people are gay, some people are lesbian, and almost all of them are going to be having sex for all of their adult lives.
  • Some people are inherently nonmonogamous, and won’t be monogamous even under the threat of losing everything in their life.
  • Some people belong to religions that promote a form of polygamy or polyamory.
  • Consensual adult sex, gay, heterosexual, or whatever, monogamous, group, or whatever, is only illegal if it is consanguinamorous (in most states) or even if it isn’t, but still falls under anti-incest laws. Legally married or not, it isn’t illegal for adults to have sex with multiple adults they and perhaps their church considers their spouses, or complete strangers, including a different person (or two) every night.
  • There are people in consanguinamorous relationships, some with children together, who would marry if they legally could.
  • It isn’t illegal for one man to get multiple women pregnant at the same time.
  • It isn’t illegal, in most states, for three or more adults to live together as spouses or sexual partners.
  • A man can have woman carry a child for him as a surrogate mother and he can raise the child by himself or with another man or men. There’s also adoption.
  • A woman can use donated sperm to get pregnant and raise a child by herself or with another woman or women. There’s also adoption.
  • There are people doing all of these things, and they’re not going to stop.

Given all of these facts, if these adults could legally marry any consenting adults, and at least some of them did as we know some would, it would mean more of the sex, cohabitation, and parenting that is going to happen anyway would happen within marriage. More of the households would be married households. Fewer children would be living with unmarried parents. More people would have the benefits of marriage.

Given these facts, wouldn’t it be better for “family values” and “morality” and “freedom of religion” to support full marriage equality?

Full marriage equality would also mean fewer marriages undertaken solely for something like immigration purposes and fewer people being unwittingly used as beards for someone who is in the closet. Polygamous marriage even makes it more likely that young children can be with a parent rather than in day care, if that is something someone is worried about. Think about it; in many places families can't live on one income, but if there are three spouses, two can earn incomes while the third is home.

If “family values” are really about helping people, and reducing unmarried sex, cohabitation, and parenting, then people who use that phrase will support full marriage equality. It not, then we’ll know they’re really most concerned with protecting privileges for heterosexual, claimed-monogamist, Christians-of-only-some-denominations.[Note: This entry was first posted on this blog several years ago. It is still relevant. Nothing written in this entry is intended to be against nonmarital relationships or sex.]

Read More »

Saturday, December 16, 2017

Why? Many of the Same Reasons Anyone Else Does It

Vicky Wireko wrote at myjoyonline.com under "Reality Zone: Why would a father sleep with his biological daughter?"

Without yet getting to the text of the piece, the terms need to be defined. By "sleep," she no doubt means intercourse. But is she referring to rape or is she referring to consensual sex?  Rape and lovemaking are two different things. Rape should always be illegal. Lovemaking should never be illegal. But "biological daughter" can mean a woman the father didn't meet or didn't have a relationship with until she was an adult, or at least hasn't had a relationship with since an early age. Consanguinamory initiated through Genetic Sexual Attraction has a different dynamic than consanguinamory growing from an existing sociological relationship.

Why would a father make love with his biological daughter? I'm talking about CONSENT ADULTS here.

For many of the the same reasons a man would have sex with any woman:

He's a heterosexual male and she's a receptive or initiating female he finds attractive.

They love each other.

It feels good and is fun. This is especially true when it comes to consanguinamory.

To bond.

To express love.

To have children.

Some of them have been brought together through Genetic Sexual Attraction, some of them haven't.

There are many reasons, but they shouldn't need to justify it to anyone else. Why is ultimately theirs to share, not anyone else's business. Perhaps a better question is why wouldn't/shouldn't he? Sex is not a bad thing. Those who think it is are probably doing it wrong.

What did Wireko have to say? Let's see...

Everything is certainly wrong with a father sleeping with his blood daughter.
 Does she give a reason?
It is repugnant apart from the fact that it is a taboo in our custom.
Ah, Discredited Arguments #1 and 2.

However, when a father’s love for his daughter straddles beyond parental love veering off to lust, to the extent of sexual abuse, it becomes horrendous.
Abuse and lovemaking are two different things. She goes on to write about abuse, without giving a good reason as to why consenting adults shouldn't be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage. Don't like it? Don't do it. But there ARE adult women in loving spousal-type relationships with their biological fathers, despite what prejudiced bigots think.

Please also see Intergenerational Relationships Can Work 



why would a woman sleep with her father why would a father and daughter have sex why would a parent have sex with an adult child why would a woman have sex with her father

Read More »

Friday, December 15, 2017

NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #10


“Polyamory/polygamy spreads sexually transmitted infections.” Unprotected sex with someone who is infected is how such infections may be transmitted. Twenty people could have group sex and a group marriage for fifty years and if none of them brings an infection into the marriage and they only have sex with each other, none of them will get a sexually transmitted infection.

We do not deny people their freedom to marry based on which diseases they have. In most places, people can legally have sex with multiple partners anyway. Polyfidelity can be encouraged if polygamy is legalized and polyamory is no longer stigmatized, which would actually reduce disease transmission. Polyamorous people tend to be more careful about prevention, safer sex, and actually talking about the issues involved.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://ift.tt/1K0B6Zj

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #9 

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #11

Read More »

Chocolate Orange Cake with Orange Glaze








At my work place, we have a tradition of celebrating everyone's birthdays. Recently it was one of my co-worker's birthday. She has dairy allergy and therefore cannot eat regular cakes. I wanted to make her something pretty that didn't have dairy in it. I then decided to make her a Chocolate-Orange Marble Bundt Cake with orange glaze. As you can see I have made Chocolate-Orange Marble Bundt Cake before but without the glaze. I used powdered sugar and royal icing flowers to decorate the cake. 

 













This time I decided to try a slightly different cake recipe. I must proudly admit that this was an experiment that was successful. The cake was moist, light and with the right amount of sweetness.  I was proud of the end result and the testimony to that is not only my friend whose birthday it was liked it but all my other co-workers did too and the cake was gone in no time!! Bonus: it looked so pretty. 

    























This is a cake that is easy to make and decorate, especially on a weekday. It is perfect for the upcoming holiday season where you attend so many holiday parties and may have to bring something or have to host one and have so many items to prepare !



 

Servings: 10-12

Prep time: 30 minsCook time: 45 mins-60 mindTotal time: 75-90 mins


Ingredients:


For the Cake:

All purpose flour: 2 cups
Baking powder: 1 tsp
Baking soda: 1 & 1/2 tsp
Salt: pinch
Cocoa powder: 1/2 cup
Instant coffee: 1 & 1/2 tbsp
Milk: 1 cup
Hot water: 1/2 cup
Powdered sugar: 1 & 1/2 cups
Cooking oil : 1 cup 
Eggs: 3 large
Orange juice: 1/4 cup 
Orange zest: 2 tbsp ( from 1 medium orange) 
Raisins: 1/2 cup
Vanilla essence: 1 tsp

For the glaze:

butter: 1/2 cup 
orange juice: 1/4 cup 
powdered sugar: 1 cup 
orange zest: 1 tsp + 1 tsp

Method:


Preheat the oven to 350 degree F.

Grease the Bundt pan thoroughly and keep ready.

Seive together flour, baking soda, baking powder, sugar and salt and keep aside. You could also just whisk it using a whisk. Whisk thoroughly.

Mix the instant coffee and cocoa powder in hot water and keep aside.

In a bowl, using an electric mixer, beat the eggs, with the oil, milk and vanilla essence. 

Add the wet ingredients to the dry ingredients. Mix well. Do not overmix!

Divide the batter into two equal portions. 

To the first half add the water, coffee and cocoa mixture and mix well. Again, do not overmix! If the batter is too thick, add a tbsp of milk.

To the other bowl,  add the orange juice, orange zest and raisins. Mix gently but thoroughly. Do not over mix!

Now pour the batter into the Bundt  pan little at a time alternating between the chocolate and the orange flavored ones. Start and end with the chocolate batter.

Tap the Bundt pan against the kitchen countertop to get rid of any air bubbles. 

Place it in the center rack of the oven and bake for 40-45 minutes it until a skewer comes out clean.

My oven took 40 minutes. Keep checking after 35 minutes and adjust the time accordingly.

When done, take the pan out and let it cool down for atleast 30 minutes before taking it out of the pan and place it on the wire-rack.

Let it cool completely before decorating it.

While the cake is cooling, prepare the glaze.




For the glaze: 

Add the butter to a pan. Once it is melted, add the orange juice, sugar and bring it to a boil. Reduce the flame and simmer for 5 mins stirring continuously. Turn off the flame. Stir in the zest.

Glazing the cake: 

Once the cake is completely cooled, place it on the serving plate/tray. Spoon the glaze on top of the cake. Sprinkle the remaining zest on top. The glaze thickens once it cools down. 

Enjoy! 

Cooking made easy:


You could make this cake spiked by adding orange liqueur. To do this, add 1/2 cup Curacao or Triple Sec to the glaze with the orange zest once the flame is turned off.

Tip for healthy living:


Since Bundt cakes are not layered with frosting or iced, they are a great alternative to iced cakes thereby reducing the sugar intake. 


Food for thought:


Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. Theodore Roosevelt 


Read More »

Parenting, parties and the Christmas holidays: If you have a 14 or 15-year-old, hold on tight - it could be a bumpy ride!

If you speak to teachers, particularly Year Co-ordinators who follow a cohort of students through high school, they will often tell you that they see the biggest change occur in the young people when they return to school after the Christmas holiday period between Years 9 and 10. Sometimes it can be a year earlier or even a year later, but it nearly always seems to occur when the students have returned from that extended summer break. Now you could argue that this is simply due to the length of time the students are away from school but in my experience this behavioural change often appears to be due to a change in parenting that occurs over those summer months, particularly in regards to those young people aged around 14 and 15.

The summer break (both before and after the Christmas and New Year holidays) is a time when there are usually lots of parties or gatherings and parents are bombarded by requests to attend this or that event. It's the most social time of the year, for both teens and their parents, and everyone wants to let their hair down just a little. The holidays are also long - very long! Many teens have almost 8 weeks away from school, that's a time where you have to maintain your daily schedule (particularly difficult if both parents are working), keep your family running as usual and also ensure your kids are occupied and safe. They're going to want to catch up with friends, go to the movies, travel to the beach or whatever and, at the same time, you have to keep doing what you would usually do if they weren't on a break and maintain a healthy level of parental monitoring and control ... It's not surprising that at this time of the year some parents find this all just a little bit too difficult and let their guard down, letting some things 'slip through to the keeper'. Things that you wouldn't normally allow to happen are permitted and then you've set a precedent and it all goes downhill from there!

I've written about the unique issues that I believe parents of Year 9s face many times. Those aged 14-15 years are going through that really interesting time called 'middle adolescence' and they are going to push as many boundaries and rules as they can to try to get want they want. They're also going to be relentless in their efforts - begging and pleading, threatening, slamming doors, telling you that you're a bad parent, "you're the only one that does that!" and that they hate you - and in normal circumstances you're often able to stand your ground, but it would appear that the summer break is where this age group can often find the crack in their parents' resolve!

A great example of this is how many 14-15 year-olds manage to get permission from their parents to travel into the city they live and watch the NYE fireworks! Groups of unbelievably young people making their way into the city, usually by public transport, and then wandering the streets (often drinking alcohol) - truly bizarre! What is a parent thinking? I don't know if any of these people have actually been into a city on NYE but it's certainly not the place for a group of 14 and 15-year-olds to travel unsupervised. Last year I had a mother contact me to ask me what I thought about her 15-year-old daughter's request to travel into Perth to watch the fireworks there - she didn't want her to go but she seemed to be the only parent who had a problem with it and was she simply being overprotective, as one of the other mothers had suggested? All I did when she called me was to ask her whether she felt comfortable with her daughter taking part in such an activity and if she didn't, why not? She was adamant that she didn't and essentially her reason was 'safety' - she didn't feel that it was a 'safe' thing for someone of her daughter's age to do. I then asked her why then was she was even considering it? The answer was simple - her daughter would not let up - the begging and pleading and the constant barrage of "you're the only one" was just too much. As she said to me - "At least when she's at school I have some relief during the day, when she's on holidays I can't get away from it!"

As I've said many times before the key to good parenting is not all about saying 'no', it's more about looking for those opportunities where you can say 'yes' and allow them to do something. 'No' remains one of the most important words you will ever say to your teen (most probably the fourth most important, just behind the three little words "I love you") but if you overuse it or don't use it properly, you're going to have great conflict and your relationship with your child will suffer. Of course you have to have rules and boundaries and appropriate consequences if your child breaks those rules but you can't simply lock them up in their room and wrap them up in cotton wool in an effort to keep them as safe as possible. They're going to have to do things you don't want them to do and then make mistakes and do the wrong thing, that's how they learn, that's how we learnt. You just don't want those mistakes to be potentially life threatening ... Am I for one second suggesting that you should even consider allowing a 14 or 15-year-old wander into the city to watch the NYE fireworks? Of course not, this is incredibly dangerous and to my mind this has the word 'no' all over it!

Without any doubt your teen is going to 'try it on' over the summer break, particularly that group who are going through that wonderful stage of 'middle adolescence' (parents of Year 9s, I'm sure you know exactly what I mean!). They're getting older and they're going to want more independence and if there's ever a time you're going to let them get away with just a little more than in the past it's during the school holidays - the long school holidays! You'll be tired and they'll be relentless in their efforts to get what they want. It's a very strong parent who is able to maintain their resolve throughout this time - most give in, at least a little! Remember, look for opportunities over the summer break to say 'yes' - identify activities or events that you may now feel a little more comfortable with, particularly things that they may have previously requested that you said 'no' to in the past, e.g., going to the movies with friends by themselves, catching a train to the beach, etc. Make sure you still have your rules and boundaries around these and maintain your standards but 'allowing' them to do new, more adult things will help keep your relationship just a little more healthy when you have to say 'no' to the big ones which are bound to raise their ugly head!

Most importantly, remember that once you have let your guard down and allowed them to do something, it is extremely hard to go back. At 14 or 15 they may think they're now adults but they have very little, if any, life experience and when put into adult situations and things go wrong they simply have no idea what to do. The vast majority of the deaths I have been involved with in schools over the years have involved this age group - young people who did not have any clue how to respond when things didn't go as planned. Of course you've got to let them grow up and have experiences that are potentially risky, but at 14 and 15 (and even 16 in most cases), these should be controlled as much as possible. If you're going to 'give in' a little over the break (and no-one can blame you - it's a long time to maintain your resolve), choose carefully - you don't want to paint yourself into a corner for the year and years ahead ...

Read More »

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

The Consanguinamorous and Allies Have a Place to Talk

If you're consanguinamorous or have ever been in a consanguinamorous relationship, are experiencing Genetic Attraction or Genetic Sexual Attraction, you're a friend or family member of someone who is, or you're an ally in general, there is a good forum for you called Kindred Spirits. It's free, so come check it out, sign up with a username, and follow the instructions. The forum is based in France, which has no laws against consenting adults being consanguinamorous, but the forum is in English.

Please note:
  • Kindred Spirits is for people considering consanguinamory or who have been involved in consanguinamory, or experiencing Genetic Attraction or Genetic Sexual Attraction, and allies, and supportive or curious friends and family.
  • It is NOT for anyone under the age of 18.
  • The forum is porn-free. There are plenty of other places for that.
  • The forum is not for fetishists or anyone else looking for fap material. There are plenty of other places for that.
  • The forum is not a place for haters to express their bigotry, prejudice, and ignorance. You're doing that in many other places.
  • The forum is not for any adult who engages in, or wants to advocate, abusing minors or abusing anyone.


Read More »